Finding Nirvana

I’m on a mission to find peace within. This all started with one (Yep. One! Count it! UNO!) yoga class I’d taken a few months ago and has steadily progressed into…. a place I’ve found. It’s dragged me out of my shell and dropped me somewhere new. Somewhere that I’m more aware of my “self talk” and the conversations I have with others. It allows ease in finding something amazing in the everyday “stuff” and just makes things better. 

​It’s also led to my interest in meditation. There’s a weird thing that happens when you successfully meditate. (the key word here is successfully) You find yourself carving out more time for meditation. What happens bi weekly turns into three times a week. Turns into daily. Turns into recognizing when you’re feeling stressed and finding a way to positively respond to the stress and stop it before it takes over your life.


​Annnnnnnd suddenly you’re calmer. More “grounded” – whatever that means. Seriously! “Grounded” is a silly term that can only be understood once you experience it. Until then, it’s just a word. And if you dare to speak that word to someone who hasn’t experienced it you’ll likely to catch an eye roll. ( or a throat punch)


​The frustration of the “ungrounded” is real my friends.


​This interest in meditation led me to seek out others who meditate in hopes of guidance in my new skill. And as luck would have it, a meditation class is scheduled at the yoga studio I attend RIGHT AFTER my yoga class. (Seriously yo. That’s like fate or something.) It took a few weeks of preparing the homestead for my 13 hour long absence, (Don’t judge! A girls gotta work. Follow that with a yoga class AND a meditation class and BAM! Gone all day long! ) but we got it figured out.


​So there I was, sitting in a circle, knee to knee with a dozen or so fellow mediators looking for guidance on the path of the enlightened.

 The first order of the day was to open the floor so the attendees could discuss their week and how the lessons they’ve learned during class were used. A few stood up to speak. We laughed. We nodded. We enjoyed their insight.


​Then came Lady C. We all strained to listen as she quietly described her crappy day. She mentioned hating to be a speaker but being assigned a presentation for 50 people that day. It didn’t go well. The projector didn’t work, the microphone sounded awful. Things fell down. The more that happened, the worse it got. She was exhausted, her ego was wounded and she was struggling.


​As the tears began to stream down her face she asked a question that hit me in my core so hard it took my breath away. “How do I find nirvana?”


​No one spoke. We all empathized with her, but we didn’t have an answer. The silence was deafening.


​That moment stayed with me all week long. I wanted the answer. I wanted that peace. I needed an understanding.


​The following Monday was my day to watch Baby ‘Rissma. Our beautiful, fun, and curious one year old “baby from another mama”. She was especially busy that day and I was frustrated. Nothing she was doing was out of the ordinary for a curious one year old; I was just tired and overwhelmed. In a desperate attempt to distress the situation I opened my front door and let her go outside to explore, while I followed an arms length behind.


​It was on this walk that I discovered how to find nirvana.


​Nirvana isn’t “A” place, it’s EVERY place. It’s in every moment, and all around. You just have to look at the world through the eyes of a one year old. If you’re not sure how to do that, I strongly suggest you find your nearest one year old right away. Scoop them up, kiss their sweet face, then set them in a field and watch the magic happen.


​I could go into the science of a one year old and their brain; tell you how it’s constantly developing, that they’re learning from their senses, blah, blah ,blah. But I won’t.- Not because I don’t want to, but because I just don’t speak “in science.” (I wish I was that cool) So instead of the facts, I’ll share the awesome that is finding nirvana by way of looking at the world through the eyes of a one year old.


​See, when a one year old steps into any surrounding, they’re experiencing it for the first time. It’s true, they may have seen it the day before, or even five minutes ago, but it’s still new to them. They haven’t smelled THAT smell yet, or tasted THAT corner of table. The colors are new to study. The texture is new to touch. 

 And they will smell, taste, look at intently and touch the crap out of everything in EVERY situation.


​And that my friend IS nirvana.


​So the next time you decide you need to find it, stop for a second. Take a breath. Let yourself understand what the ground feels like under your feet. What the sun feels like on your face. How the air smells. Listen to the sounds around you. Just let yourself be for a second. You have never experienced this moment, and you never will again.


​That’s a big deal. Appreciate it.